Saturday, June 22, 2013

Real Progress

Hello my lovely ladies (:

I am so ecstatic. This other site is helping me so much. I met this girl that I've started texting and we keep each other on track so well! I actually just completed the 5th day of a fast. That's my new best! And I'm still going. I weighed in one day 3 and I went down from 160 to 154.4. I'm going for two more days but I may go even longer, I'm not sure yet.

Anyway, I just had to let all of you know how I've been doing. I'm back to my old self and headed to 123!

Monday, June 17, 2013

Alcohol and new site

Soo, I got to drinking again and it totally knocked me off track. SO frustrating. But I haven't gained any. That's worth something. Buuut, the scale quit working a couple days ago. Kind of freaking out about that. It's weird, it doesn't really matter but I just have to see those numbers, even if it's bad. Anyway, I found thhis awesome site It's put together amazingly well and has tons of members. It even has a chat room! It's not as expressive or artistic as blogger but it's great when you need someone to talk to asap. Anyway, just thought I'd mention it in case anyone wanted to check it out. I'm currently 19+ hours into a fast. I'm not sure what the goal is yet. At least all of today, maybe 2 or 3.

Sunday, June 2, 2013

Day 5 and Today

Yesterday, day 5, didn't go so well either. Ended up at a spontaneous dinner with no healthy options. I ordered what I could and just decided I wouldn't eat much but I got a little carried away. Not terrible, but bad enough. Today I snacked without even thinking so I wanted to get on here and promise myself and you girls that I wouldn't eat anymore. I have a bet with a friend to weigh 150 by June 20th. That's roughly ten pounds in 2.5 weeks. I have to stop messing up even if it's only a little. I'm figuring out I just don't lose weight like I used to.

Friday, May 31, 2013


Well it's pretty much the end of day four since I've restarted restricting even though I'll be up for hours yet. I guess I'd like to let you know how I've been and maybe reevaluate things since I've been gone for so long.
Day 1: 1 and 1/2 sandwich with mayo, green onions, and spinach. Under 500 cal
Day 2: 1 beer 180 cal
Day 3: 2 wraps consisting of tortilla, mayo, green onion, spinach, shredded cheese. Under 400 cal
Day 4: I didn't do so good today honestly. I'd rather not say what I ate but it was still under 1000 cal.

That's how it's been in the food world. Now otherwise: Um, I got a job at the beginning of the year. Worked for 3 months and started drinking pretty heavily again. That's how I fell off track so badly. If I'm to be honest with you girls, drinking is always going to be an issue for me. Well maybe it's pessimistic to say always but you know what I mean. I quit that job after a while in pursuit of a new job but then got caught up in my own emotions and such. That's what I'm doing back here I suppose. However, I am going to start that new job soon, within the next week or two. Hopefully I can stay on track once I'm busy. I'll need you girls' help with that. I'm really excited to have a steady income again. I want a car, to move out, tattoos, beautiful furniture and decor. Can't wait c:

I suppose that's all for now. Oh! I'm having trouble commenting on certain blogs so I may post something for specific people at times. I know it may not be very effective but it's better than nothing. Good night for now girls <3 Stay strong

Thursday, May 30, 2013

Good news

It would appear my blog is functional again. :) I'm really happy about that, I need this. Two days ago I weighed in at 160. Wow :c I feel kind of guilty about this but I have a friend I've kind of tricked into helping me lose weight. I'm really excited about that though, I've never had someone in my direct life to help me along. Anyway, I'm so glad to be back, I can't wait to get thin and happy again. I look forward to hearing from any and all of you. Holy shit it's been a long time. :/

Tuesday, October 9, 2012


Well... In an attempt to rectify the problems I've had with Blogger things have only gotten worse. I can no longer access my email ( and now Everytime I try to go to my homepage it crashes completely. Ugh. I swear I have the worst luck, things are just always so complicated. But I don't fucking care. I won't stop this time. It may take a month and I may have to change every goddamn thing or just start brand new but I'll fucking do it. Bit by bit, piece by piece. I'm coming back and nothing can stop me. I'm going to attempt this all again tomorrow and hopefully I can fix at least one damn thing. Oh on top of all of that, I lost all of my old data and media. No thinspo, no sites, no passwords etc. What seems like a lifetime of accumulated information and support - lost. Out of all of this there is one piece of good news. I didn't eat today. Nothing. And that feels great. I know a couple of days ago I weighed 151.6 pounds. So much when I look out how much lower I've gotten and been. But hey, I have to stay positive. Apparently this is a new beginning for me (whether I chose it or not) and I'm just going to make the best of that I can. You'll be hearing from me again, you can count on that. I am determined.

Still trying to be here

Blogger on my device is still an ass. But if I feel determined enough I can get something rough posted. Anyway, I'm in the midst of reading this entire blog on tumblr from beginning to end. There's a lot to be said about my obsessive and addictive personality. Ha Anyway the blog is called I'm about halfway through (60 of 122 pages) but hear is the troubling part. Just from what I read on the first page the boy who kept this particular blog has died. :/ I can't believe it, i hope it's some cruel or twisted hoax but by all appearances it's legitimate. About 20 or 30 pages into reading I said in a choked whisper "No, I don't want him to be dead, he can't be. I need to talk to this boy." Ugh It's a lonely night. I'm getting really motivated to do whatever I can to get blogger working for me again. I need to get back to my girls and my blog on here. I miss you so. And I really, really want to find another ana boy that I can talk with.